Don’t Jump to Conclusions

This habit destroys us in two ways. One, we have decided as if we know what is going to happen, so we are very inattentive and act on that decision. Two, we have imagined that we can read minds and as if we know why other people do what they do or what they think. It is this foolishness that destroys relationships like no other.

Don’t Dramatize

Many people make catastrophes out of minor setbacks and react accordingly. That is, they make a big deal out of it. This habit breeds anxiety, the cause of which, in fact, either doesn’t exist or is so small that it’s nothing to worry about. Why do people do this? Who knows? Maybe to look and feel more important, needed. Either way, it’s as stupid as it is harmful to ourselves.

Don’t Make Up Rules

99% of all those “need” and “must” we bind ourselves with are useless. All they provide is nervousness and guilt. Why? By following these imaginary rules, you clog your brain with unnecessary restrictions and childish attitudes. And when you transfer these rules to others, you turn into a tedious whiner or self-righteous bigot.

Avoid Limitations

The words you use can make a monster out of you, a negativist to the bone. The language of negativity and criticism breeds the same mindset. By trying to squeeze things into certain categories, you stop seeing their real meaning, thus limiting your thinking to absolute uselessness. Don’t label things. And you will be surprised at what you will see.

Don’t Be a Perfectionist

Life is not limited by dualities. In most cases, “enough” means just enough. If you look for the perfect job for you, you probably won’t find it. Other jobs will seem much worse than they really are. If you look for the perfect relationship, you will likely spend your life alone. Perfectionism is a “mental illness” that will not let you enjoy your life, but will send you on a search for something that is not there every time.

Don’t Generalize

One or two, maybe three failures is not yet a sign of permanent failure. And a single victory will not make you a genius. A one-time event – good or bad – is not always a sign of a lingering trend. As a general rule, things are what they are and nothing more.

Don’t Take it Personally

Most of the people around you, even your close friends, don’t talk, think or care about you 99% of their time. People in your company or living in your neighborhood may have never heard of you. And they don’t want to hear about you. Life’s fortunes and failures, the warmth and indifference of others have nothing to do with you. If they pretend, it will only make you feel more miserable than you really are.

Don’t Give in to Apathy

Train yourself to be optimistic. If you expect bad things in life, you will find them. A negative mindset is the same as looking at the world as a crooked mirror. You will only notice the imperfections and the positives go unnoticed. It’s mind-boggling, how can you see what isn’t there? And of course, if you start looking for positive things, you will find them too.

Don’t Live in the Past

This tip is the most important of all: forget and move on with your life. Most anger, frustration, unhappiness and despair in this world comes from people who hold on to past hurts and problems. The more you run them through your mind, the bigger they will seem to you, and the worse you will feel. Don’t fight the unhappiness, look at it from the outside. And you will find the big advantages instead of the little disadvantages. Do this and thereby take away the power of the past to hurt you.